Alphabet Of Manly Virtues: “Y” Is For “Yearning”

25 Jul

EDITOR’S NOTE: We decided to skip the letter “X” in our series… after all, what character qualities start with “X”? If you can think of any, write up a post and we’ll share it! -DW

ySplagchnizomai”

So, I heard this word in a message a few months back and I have become fascinated with the word. Since then, I have been searching for a way to use this word. Our pastor explained the meaning during the message, but I am including it here.

  • to be moved as to one’s bowels, hence to be moved with compassion, have compassion (for the bowels were thought to be the seat of love and pity).
  • It is yearning, being filled with compassion and love for your fellow man.

In all my time trying to figure out how I can use this word in writing, I think I have forgotten the point of it. To be moved with compassion. To yearn for more. To be better than I am right now.

I have to tell you, I struggle with that. When I really think about what kind of witness I am becoming, I know that it is far from where I want to be. When I am in church, I feel a little inadequate. I haven’t been on my walk nearly as long as some others have, and I really want to be immersed the way that they are. Sometimes I can be moved to tears during worship and other times feel lost and wandering away from Him.

When I think about Jesus Christ, I marvel at the man he must have been. He showed his love to everyone that he came into contact with. He put others needs before his own, and he was a servant. Perhaps the greatest servant to ever walk the Earth. And he urges us to do the same. I want to be a servant. I want for my walk to mean something not only to myself, but to my family and to Him.

But when I look inside myself, I realize that I could do more than I do. I feel like I don’t do enough. I feel like I don’t do “my part”. I feel like I am not “in it” like I should be. There is an emptiness that I know I can fill with the fellowship and community that He provides for me. I have to remember that it is an everyday process and not something just to do on Sundays.

I feel something deep down inside me that wants to be unleashed into the world and be a better man, husband, father and follower. I yearn. I long to be better. I know that I can be. I have seen glimpses of it. I think that I have done a much better job of husband and father. I still struggle with being a better believer and in turn, being a better man.

I have to make a confession. I don’t read my bible enough. I hear people reciting verse from memory, with the verse they are reciting perfectly matched for the situation that they are talking about. I marvel at this. I get intimidated by this. But it isn’t only that, but when you look beyond that, it is in their actions. I see people immersed in fellowship and service and wonder how they have time for it all

I want that. I crave that. I yearn to be a better Christian. But I make excuses. I don’t have time. I don’t have the energy, and even sometimes, I don’t have the money. I find ways to avoid putting myself out there. When I come home from work, I don’t really want to do a whole lot. I will help my wife with dinner and spend some time with my kids and get them ready for bed. I can’t imagine after dinner getting up from the table and saying, okay, let’s head to church. But I am missing out, and I am slowly starting to realize it.

I am missing out on friendships that I can make. I am missing out on fellowship with community members, and I am missing out on ways that I can serve. My wife and I had dinner with another couple and their children recently. It was on a Saturday night, and usually my wife and I don’t really do a whole lot but relax. My in-laws take all the kids, except our one year old, and we just usually hang at home and watch a movie. But we changed it up for once. They are from our church, and we knew them fairly well. But there is such a difference between talking to someone at church for 10 minutes, and sharing a meal with them and spending three hours together. I have missed that friendship without even knowing.

It has re-ignited a spark in me that I have been missing for a while. I yearn to make new friends that are walking the walk. I yearn for fellowship with my new friends and those still to come. I yearn to serve in some way. I yearn to be more compassionate and make a difference in others lives.

I will not pretend to be any better than I was a few weeks ago. It takes time. I have started reading my bible more often, and I have been reading a lot more Christian blogs that I have come across. I am enjoying getting myself immersed. I look forward to getting a little more involved and meeting new friends. My hope is that it I will become a light in this world. My hope is that I will make a difference in this world, no matter how small my contribution may be.

So, I will yearn. I will yearn everyday. And I will yearn to show the same love and compassion that He has given to me.

 

-Sean Sheehan

18me&boys

Sean Sheehan is a learning Christian, devoted husband and loving father of four wonderful boys. He has a fulltime job and attends school part time. He is an aspiring writer and an amateur radio show host. He is also an enthusiastic runner and a fairly decent slot receiver in his flag football league. Life is AWESOME!! To keep up with what Sean is doing, you can go to any of the following: The Hub Sports (also on Facebook and Twitter) and Spitin Truth Radio (also on TwitterFacebook, and BlogTalkRadio).

I do not proclaim to be a great Christian or a great writer for that matter, but I am an imperfect person who likes to share my walk with Christ. I am someone who is inexperienced and is constantly having to find my way back onto the path. If you are like me and want someone to talk to, please feel free to leave comments or send me an email. We can chat and help each other along the way.  -Sean

One Response to “Alphabet Of Manly Virtues: “Y” Is For “Yearning””

  1. Tahne Lutz :) September 27, 2014 at 17:53 #

    Thank you for your thoughtful insights. I, too, yearn to do more and be more. Your words have given me exactly what I needed today. THANKS.

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