The Day I Forgot How to Hang a Door

10 Oct

© 2009 thefixer, Flickr | CC-BY | via Wylio

For those who know me well, the title might surprise you because I am not exactly handy.  I am actually really bad when it comes to creating things with my hands.  I worked as a carpenter one summer, but my boss and I learned quickly that carpentry wasn’t an occupational fit for me.

So the story is not exactly about me, but it is about a friend of mine – a friend who understands people, and has been a carpenter for most of his life.

When I was going through a job transition, he knew that my journey was not easy, and cared enough to call.  At first, he knew that I didn’t want to talk to anyone so he started leaving messages – long messages.  They were often so long that the voice recorder would usually cut him off.  So he would call again, and begin his second message by complaining how my phone had cut him off.  After a few weeks, he grew so used to leaving messages, that he was disappointed if I picked up.

Over the weeks and months, he didn’t call once… or twice.  My voicemail is filled with nothing but his messages, and I don’t want to delete a single one.   Each message is filled with laughter, and wrapped with his clear love and support.

Recently, he grew tired of leaving my voice messages, and decided that we needed to have lunch.  So we met, and start talking about life, and how we are doing.

During one point I told him that I was really struggling with feeling as if I could really talk to people.  His eyes lit up, and he said, “David Boyd having trouble talking to people, Hmmm.”  Then he sat back in his chair and stroked his beard (which all bearded men seem to do before they say something wise), “Did I ever tell you that when I once left a job, that I believed that I could no longer hang a door?”

door and carpenter

© 1972 The U.S. National Archives, Flickr | PD | via Wylio

He leaned in and asked, “Do you think that I knew how to hang a door?”  Although, I personally didn’t know what it took to hang a door, I knew he could do it.  He had worked as a carpenter for most of his life, and I had seen him do it MULTIPLE times.  I never answered, so he asked again even louder.  “Do you think that I could hang a door?”

“I lost all confidence in who I was, and I thought that I had forgotten how to hang a door.  Then, in my deepest need, a friend came and worked beside me when I couldn’t do it on my own.”

I will never forget what he said next.

“The same is true for you, my friend.  You know how to talk to people.  You have done it thousands of times.  I have seen you do it.  You just need someone to tell you so, and to keep you company until your confidence comes back.”

I am thankful to God for a friend that calls me over and over again in order to remind me how God has designed and gifted me for the sake of His Kingdom.

To those of you who are struggling with what once seemed simple.  If you feel that you have forgotten how to hang a door, you still can.  However, you might need a friend to remind you.

Dr. G. David Boyd is the Founder and Managing Director of EA Resources.  He is thankful for how God moves among His people to provide love to those who feel unlovely, and support to those often overlooked.

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