Tag Archives: Encouragement

The Day I Forgot How to Hang a Door

10 Oct

© 2009 thefixer, Flickr | CC-BY | via Wylio

For those who know me well, the title might surprise you because I am not exactly handy.  I am actually really bad when it comes to creating things with my hands.  I worked as a carpenter one summer, but my boss and I learned quickly that carpentry wasn’t an occupational fit for me.

So the story is not exactly about me, but it is about a friend of mine – a friend who understands people, and has been a carpenter for most of his life.

When I was going through a job transition, he knew that my journey was not easy, and cared enough to call.  At first, he knew that I didn’t want to talk to anyone so he started leaving messages – long messages.  They were often so long that the voice recorder would usually cut him off.  So he would call again, and begin his second message by complaining how my phone had cut him off.  After a few weeks, he grew so used to leaving messages, that he was disappointed if I picked up.

Over the weeks and months, he didn’t call once… or twice.  My voicemail is filled with nothing but his messages, and I don’t want to delete a single one.   Each message is filled with laughter, and wrapped with his clear love and support.

Recently, he grew tired of leaving my voice messages, and decided that we needed to have lunch.  So we met, and start talking about life, and how we are doing.

During one point I told him that I was really struggling with feeling as if I could really talk to people.  His eyes lit up, and he said, “David Boyd having trouble talking to people, Hmmm.”  Then he sat back in his chair and stroked his beard (which all bearded men seem to do before they say something wise), “Did I ever tell you that when I once left a job, that I believed that I could no longer hang a door?”

door and carpenter

© 1972 The U.S. National Archives, Flickr | PD | via Wylio

He leaned in and asked, “Do you think that I knew how to hang a door?”  Although, I personally didn’t know what it took to hang a door, I knew he could do it.  He had worked as a carpenter for most of his life, and I had seen him do it MULTIPLE times.  I never answered, so he asked again even louder.  “Do you think that I could hang a door?”

“I lost all confidence in who I was, and I thought that I had forgotten how to hang a door.  Then, in my deepest need, a friend came and worked beside me when I couldn’t do it on my own.”

I will never forget what he said next.

“The same is true for you, my friend.  You know how to talk to people.  You have done it thousands of times.  I have seen you do it.  You just need someone to tell you so, and to keep you company until your confidence comes back.”

I am thankful to God for a friend that calls me over and over again in order to remind me how God has designed and gifted me for the sake of His Kingdom.

To those of you who are struggling with what once seemed simple.  If you feel that you have forgotten how to hang a door, you still can.  However, you might need a friend to remind you.

Dr. G. David Boyd is the Founder and Managing Director of EA Resources.  He is thankful for how God moves among His people to provide love to those who feel unlovely, and support to those often overlooked.

The Builder’s Response.

27 Feb

I am sorry that what I am doing is not to your liking. Not everything turned out as you expected. Disappointment is hard.  I never promised that this would be easy.  I know that you may want to change your mind. I cannot make you stay, but please hear me out before you leave.

You need to trust me.

You need to trust who I am. The One who made the heavens and the earth can surely get you through this bump in the road. The One who designed the human body can surely design a plan for your life.

You need to trust what I can do. I have promised that what I have begun to do, I will finish. The building going on should not prove my absence but my presence.  I am at work during the good and the bad.  I am near, and I have a new direction for you.

To help you find that direction, I may use circumstances that are not to your liking.  Do not be deceived. This is not the work of others. I may use others, but they are simply My instruments working what I want accomplished.

Life is not stagnant, but can change in the blink of an eye.  I do not need you to bring it to pass. I am at work.  Your meddling, your whining and your complaining will not affect My outcome, but it will ruin your journey.

The last thing for you to do right now is also the hardest.

You need to trust that I love you. The pain might seem as if I don’t care.  It may seem that I can do something to stop your pain, but won’t.  My love for you has never changed and it never will.

You have lost your focus.  Look at me.  Do not focus on the pain that has embraced you. Do not focus on the storm that rages around you.

While you wait for this storm to cease and your pain to fade,

Come unto Me for you are weary and burdened.  I will give you the rest that you so desperately need.  Take my yoke upon you, so I can help you.  I am gentle and humble in my care for you, and your soul will be revived.  You will discover that sharing the burden with me makes the journey easier, and it no longer holds the power that it once did.

The Builder

25 Feb

A parable that shows how consumerism affects our relationship with God.

I wonder what it will look like when it is completed.  It is fun to dream about, but today I am looking at what it is now – and that isn’t the best.

I feel as if there are too major problems with this deal. Something needs to be done before it is too late.

Luckily, He is still working on it.

I feel as if the rooms are not quite right. I would have placed the family room in the center- the place where we hang out and watch our favorite shows, but the builder must have made a mistake.

I feel as if the walls are all wrong, they are too low. I want them to be higher.  High walls makes me feel safe and gives me a sense of privacy.

He must not understand that I value my privacy.

I feel as if the wood is all wrong.  It is much too rough.  Unfinished wood has brought me many splinters – painful and difficult to remove.

Hasn’t he ever felt the pain from rough wood rubbing on skin?

I feel like the colors are all wrong.  They are much too dark.  Don’t get me wrong, there are many bright spots, but I want the whole house bright.  The dark spaces just have to go.

I feel as if the furnishings are all wrong.  They are much too simple.  The barest of necessities is all that is placed around the room.  It makes me wonder whether the Builder has even considered my personal comfort.

I feel as if the location is wrong.  The weather here is subject to constant change.  I am tired of storms.  All I am asking for is a little sun.  I can’t even begin to explain the neighbors – not the type of people that I want to associate with, let alone having them live beside me.

Plus, the timing is all wrong.  The whole process is taking too long.  My dreams and plans are passing me by while this builder just keeps doing His own thing. He keeps telling me it is going to be great. He keeps telling me to wait and see.  However, I am beginning to doubt.

I am beginning to tire of His future promises. I am afraid that He is taking me for a ride and that in the end, I will be left empty-handed and disappointed.  My friends keep asking why I am sticking around.  As I look around, I become more confused about what He must be thinking.

I will talk to the Builder. If He doesn’t make the changes I demand, I should just walk away.

(To Be Continued)

You are not the only one.

18 Feb

If you wonder how others make life seems so easy…

If you lose yourself in football, or video games, or binge watching media to forget life…

If you live to work, instead of working to live…

If you are fighting to get ahead, but are only falling behind…

If you want respect, but don’t respect yourself…

If you want a hug, but don’t want to ask…

If you can fix everything in the house except for the relationships…

If your wife is drifting away, you don’t know how to get her back…

If your children are okay with you being gone more than being home…

If you are spending all your outer energy, just to hide your inner life…

If want God, but you aren’t sure if He wants you…

If you have questions about your faith, and don’t know where to turn…

If you hate all that you have worked so hard to achieve…

If you feel as if you are not all you want to be…

If you feel as if you are not all you could be…

If you need help, and don’t know where to turn…

You are not the only one.

Morethanabeard.com is an on-line resource to encourage men on their spiritual journey.

Alphabet Of Manly Virtues: “E” Is For “Encouragement”

21 May

eWords have such power. Especially the negative ones. If out of 100 people 99 speak a positive word and only 1 a negative, which is the one we remember?

We all know the answer: It’s the negative one.

I suspect if you try to remember all the words which have been spoken to you by others, you’ll find it much easier to remember the negative words than the positive ones.

Am I right?

This is why it’s so important to encourage one another. It’s a habit all of us need to cultivate.

Including us men.

It would be easy to pigeon hole this to girlfriends, wives, children or just other men – and many have tried. But this habit applies to all those we know.

We are all human, and no matter what any of us say, all of us need encouragement.

And our words are more powerful than we realise.

Scripture actually commands us to encourage each other – “as long as it is called today”… Which means always. And means it’s not an optional extra we do if we are “gifted” to. It means we learn to encourage. Continue reading

%d bloggers like this: